'Oh for God’s sake' Those 4 little words was it all took for my internal world to come spiralling back down. I got judged the other day. Not for the usual things. But for something that completely took me by surprise. I solved a situation I didn't feel comfortable doing. In a different way, that I did feel comfortable doing. Even though it was going to cost an unnecessary expense. My way clearly didn't make sense to that someone else. And they expressed it with a loud 'FOR GODS SAKE’. Little did they know I was able to hear this comment through the car speaker! I'm not usually one to get easily offended. I can make jokes with my darker humour and I’d like to think I can take it back!! But sometimes I am very sensitive about things that are close to my heart. Especially things I've battled and struggled with. But that’s okay. I allowed to be sensitive. It's a part of who I am. It’s my superpower. This teeny little comment, completely innocent to anyone else, was incredibly detrimental to my mental health. It may seem small and insignificant to someone else, but for me, this is the way I've had to adapt to live to be able to function in the way that I can. And someone questioned and ridiculed it. So I snapped back into defensive mode. It took my breath away. How could someone be so thoughtless and unaware of how much of a success that was for me? But they aren't me. No one is me, but me! Just because my obstacle may have sounded silly to one person, for me I was so very proud of myself for finding another way around to solve the situation. However, in this moment of hearing 'For God's sake' the little voice of my inner self, showed me that I've had 2 options. 1. I can let this comment take over and make me miserable, drag my mood down and spiral back down into the darkness. I could let it cause issues with people and bring awkwardness and just a general load of unnecessary drama. (Cycle of my past patterns) OR 2. I could take that thoughtless comment by the horns and turn that negative energy into a positive power force and get the fuck on with it. (Reframed and Intentional) I had to take that power and force it to drive me forwards. Become motivated and powerful in succeeding in any which way I have too!! With me doing whatever the hell i need to do to survive and thrive. So I guess the moral of the story is; what do you do when you come across an obstacle on your path? You don't stop and give up. Well you can i guess... but that will only take you back to square one. You don't allow other narrow minded perspectives to make you second guess what is best for you. After all, you know you, best! But to succeed, you keep going and going and going and until you find another way round it. And that's exactly what I did. And what I need to do every single time. It’s okay to stop and take a break, feel low, but it’s so important that you get back up again. And if that means seeking out help. Then seek out help. If that means going round the long way, to make yourself feel comfortable, then go around the long way. We are all completely incomparable from one another. Not one of us is exactly the same as another. We all process differently. We all look different. We speak different languages and with different accents. It's completely unfair of someone to judge your actions, when they don't even know you. Do whatever you need to do. Take whichever path you need to take. Fast or slow or ridiculous or weird or odd or crazy. YOU DO YOU.
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